Welcome To My Green Pasture....

It is a place of quiet rest that I have found when I am writing. I hope that someone will find my musings helpful in some way.
Psalm 23:2 "He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters, he restoreth my soul."

My Green Pasture....

Monday, December 5, 2011

O Christmas Tree, O Christmas Tree...

For many people Christmas can be a very lonely and depressing time of year. Perhaps it is a season when they have lost a loved one or no longer hear the pitter- patter of little feet around the Christmas tree. There are no longer little ones with excitement in their eyes and voices on Christmas morning as they discover that Santa has once again delivered presents to their house. Putting up a Christmas tree maybe has lost its charm to some as they feel there is no real use in doing so since no one is going to join them to see it. I say to that "Bah-Humbug"! The Germans and Scandinavians began putting Evergreen trees in their homes and decorating them in the middle ages as a reminder of hope of Spring. So as I sit here and look at my small but quaint little tree I think of Hope. Hope in the greatest gift that was given one Christmas morning. Hope for a brighter future. Hope for better health. Christmas has indeed been way too over commercialized by retailers trying to generate more sales for their businesses it is true. Maybe you need to just take a few quiet moments out of your stress filled life and sit down by your Christmas tree and look at it in a different way this year.....Hope....for something better in the upcoming year.                                                               ~Psalm71:5 "For thou art my hope, O Lord God: thou art my trust from my youth."

Tuesday, November 22, 2011

More Than A Word

Here it comes again already! Thanksgiving! It is so much more than a word. It is more than the anticipation of sitting down to a turkey dinner with all of the fixings. To me it should be a special day to set aside to acknowledge thanks,not that I am not thankful on other days, but it is good to think specifically about things I am thankful for. I am finding that when I take the time to actually sit down and think on this, I realize how very blessed I am. Try it... you will find out your life is not as bad as you may think. It is so much more than just being thankful for material things...they can be taken away. It is more than being thankful for friends. They often disappoint or betray or perhaps move away, or die. It is more than being thankful for family. They don't always meet up to our expectations or can't always be there when we want them to be. It is His presence that I am the most thankful for on this Thanksgiving.  Yes, I am thankful for all of the other many things and people in my life that I have been so blessed with, but as I think on what I am most thankful for over this past year.... it has been the presence of God.
~"God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble."
Psalm 46:1

Saturday, November 19, 2011

A Handmade Treasure

Some of the greatest gifts are handmade ones. This gift was not given to me. It was given to someone with the name of Annie and apparently a long time ago. This was one of my treasures that I found one day while I was rummaging around at yard sales and antique barns and I really don't recall where or when I came across it. I know it was handmade because it is hand-carved and the hearts are not the exact size and shape and the painting along the edge was obviously by hand as well. I picked this up the other day to take a closer look and noticed that on the inside the name "Annie" was carved. Someone took a lot of time and effort to make this for Annie and here I have it in my possession. I wonder about the music that was made on this little instrument. I imagine a little girl sitting in her bedroom spending many hours by herself playing this, or maybe entertaining her grandpa who perhaps made it for her.... who knows? I am not even sure what kind of instrument this really is. Maybe one of you reading this knows....It is missing two strings but is supposed to have four. At any rate, I am sure that Annie treasured this dearly and made beautiful music with it.

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Shake IT UP

Kids nowadays maybe have no idea what this even is. Back in the day it was one of my favorite toys that I would sit and spend many hours playing with... my Etch A Sketch.... I guess it was the pre-computer toy. I would sit for hours and turn the left and right knobs to draw on the screen and write, and then if I wasn't pleased with the results would just shake it up with all of my might and it would erase the screen and I would start all over again. As the sun came up this morning I was thinking about how each new day is like a clean screen on this Etch A Sketch...there is nothing there as we start the day. What we put on there is up to us. What was there yesterday has left no trace... it is gone forever. It is a new day and I must make the most of it. No matter what ugliness was upon that screen yesterday doesn't matter this morning. All that is there is a fresh clean start. I am so very thankful for that. ~Psalm 143:8 " Let the morning bring  me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you, Show me the way I should go, for I lift up my soul."

Sunday, November 6, 2011

Overwhelming Obstacles

Someone posted this hilarious roadsign picture the other day on the internet. It got me thinking about how I have been feeling lately... as if boulders and enourmous cows or what not have been literally falling out of the sky down upon me. Just when one thing seems to get worked out another "cow" comes plopping down out of nowhere to smash my windshield and steer me off course! So many stinking obstacles in life. If we let them they can be downright discouraging. They can cause all kinds of anxiety and depression. The thing is.. I don't need to let these things control how I feel. I am learning that in spite of the fact that the one up above has way more important things to take care of than my petty problems, He still does care and does take the time out of His very busy schedule to pay attention to the details of my life. When I actually turn my cares and obstacles over to Him He does give me a peace and assurance that He is working behind the scenes to take care of things. So when I become overwhelmed with these "boulders and cows" and whatever life is whirling down upon me...I look up to the one who can and will do something about it, because He is the one in my life who cares the most and sees the whole picture. ~Psalm 145:18 "The Lord is near to all who call on Him, to all who call on Him in truth."

Thursday, October 27, 2011

I Prefer Treat!

Halloween weekend is upon us! The little goblins will be running around our neighborhoods in hopes of filling up their little plastic pumpkins with all sorts of goodies that they can collect for free. Hopefully in a safe and fun way. It brings back a lot of fun memories for me as it was always one of my favorite holidays in spite of all of the over spiritual people who always tried to make it into "Satan's" holiday. I never saw it that way and still don't. I see it as a fun time to dress up into some character and be silly and go out and get as much free candy as you could possibly collect in the short time that you ran from house to house. When I was growing up we used the biggest pillowcases we could find and of course made sure that there were no holes in them. We always tried to go to the neighborhoods where the houses were closest together so we could cover more territory in our few short hours. I have to confess that even after I had children of my own... I was one of those adults who came to your house dressed up in costume and put my container out in front of you for candy too! That was part of the fun! Watching the disgusting look on some of your faces as you saw an adult acting like a child! I say to you.... lighten up. I had a lot of fun trick or treating with my four children and I wouldn't trade it for anything. Anyway, I guess the point of all of my ranting on this subject is that I was thinking about it today... since my friend knocked on my door yesterday and asked me what I was going to be for Halloween. For the first time in years, I hadn't even given it a thought. I no longer have any little kids to take out trick or treating so I just didn't even think about it. This friend and I trucked off down to the thrift store and found me something to wear. We giggled like two little kids as I tried the getup on right there in front of people at the store. Yeah, we got weird looks and snobby people snubbed at us for a few seconds but we didn't let that dampen our mood. I thought to myself as my friend left after we got back home and had some coffee and muffins, that really that is what friends are for. When we begin to forget how to enjoy the simple little fun things of life ....sometimes we just need someone to come along and say..."c'mon, let's go do this!"  For me... it was a real treat. Trick or Treat? I prefer Treat! Thank you Lord for the simple little treats you give me.

Friday, October 21, 2011

Too Old?

I wonder sometimes about age...it is all relative to the person who is thinking about it. If you are only ten then a twenty-five year old person is extremely old! When I turned thirty I thought that I was then old. Now I am in my early fifties and when I think of someone in their sixties.... well that is not that far off! I recently went to somewhere that there was a ninety-two year old person  who was as spry as could be just full of life, happy, and up on a stage playing the piano like he was going to live another ninety years! I thought to myself that I would actually love to live this long if I could actually have that attitude and be that happy at that age! What an example of a fulfilled happy life! It is easy to think that we are through doing what we set out to do or maybe that our purpose in life is not very important any more. I recently began rethinking this. I believe you are never too old to begin again from scratch and try something new. I heard about a man who finished in a marathon at age one hundred and he only began running at age eighty-nine! I guess I can begin a few more things at my age! "I can't" should not be a part of the vocab that I am talking to myself. I need to remember that whatever it is I need to do.... I can do. Plus, whatever God brings me to, He will bring me through! Whether I endure one more year or one more decade or a few more decades, I hope that I will continue to learn new things and accomplish a few more things that are a bit more far reaching than just myself. I hope in some way I can inspire you to keep on trying and never give up in spite of the difficulties and obstacles and people in your way that have let you down and tried so hard to stop you from becoming all that your potential says you can be. Sometimes the hardest person to forgive is yourself, so give yourself a break, and forgive yourself for past failures and mistakes and move on and do a new thing that will make your ending better than your beginning.
~"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."~

Sunday, October 16, 2011

Do It Scared!

There are a lot of scary things in life way worse than the boogie man...I think every kid at one time or another thinks there is a boogie man that is lurking in the deep crevices of the closet or underneath the bed ready to crawl out and grab in the dark of the night! I for one have had to face a lot of scary situations in my lifetime... some of which seemed way too scary for me to even face. I still am facing some things right now that seem pretty darn scary but I have learned something very important.... you have to do what you have to do...whether you are scared or not... and if you have faith in God no matter what all is going on around you, then you know like I do that HE is bigger than any boogie man and bigger than any problem that I face. I am so thankful that He keeps His promise to never leave me or forsake me and is always with me to help me and provide for me and protect me. So, even though I may be scared and a bit intimidated by what lurks around the next corner... I know that He is with me and will guide, direct, and bring me through.

Sunday, October 9, 2011

So Sweet!

Sometimes it is so easy to focus on the negative things happening. We tend to notice that bad things happen in series of threes sometimes.... deaths for instance. I know that seems kind of superstitious to some but I have noticed it does seem to play out. This past week has been a week of overflowing blessings for me and more than just three in a row.. unbelievable in a way since those who know me personally know that I have been having more than my share of negative in my life. It makes me appreciate all the more when something good and sweet happens for me. There were several things that happened this week that just brought me to tears. Not tears of sadness at all.... but tears of utter joy and overwhelming happiness. When this happens it is sweet! Yesterday I was in the local candy store as pictured above.... and it reminded me of how sweet it is to experience blessings after going through some storms in your life. Maybe the storms are a good thing after all. Maybe the storms were there so I would really truly appreciate the blessings no matter how large or small they are.

Monday, October 3, 2011

Let No Root Spring Up

AH YES!! It is so easy to let those nasty old roots of bitterness begin to spring up in the depths of the soul! But I caught them! Not going to let that 'Ol stinking devil get the best of me. Sometimes it seems that people who call themselves "Christians" can be the worst people on the planet when it comes to seeking to hurt others and I just don't get this. Recently I had something happen in my life that was hurtful and certain people who are supposedly good Christians are turning this thing around as if I am the one doing the hurting... are you for real here?? I have overlooked, forgiven, extended grace where most would not have......come on ...give me a break. What is it that these people are so afraid of??? Probably just don't want to face the truth. Oh well..... like the old saying goes... "It all comes out in the wash." Plus... God rights the wrongs in my life... I don't need to waste my little bitty energy trying to do so.
~Hebrews 12:15 "See to it that no one misses the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many."

Thursday, September 29, 2011

Season Of Beauty

Awesome colors that make you step back for a moment and say "ahhh"! This is a changing season... a season of beauty before the cold and ice and dreariness of winter. I love the beauty of it! It reminds me of something talked about at our Bible study recently. Restoration... renewal...The seasons change so quickly. Fall soon turns into
Winter and I know, I sit longing what seems like an eternity, for Spring. Spring then, turns into the heat and humidity of Summer and we long once again for the coolness and crispness of Fall. After the beauty of these colored leaves they will soon begin to drop from their branches, but we know that restoration will take place and by next Spring new leaves will form, and by next Summer they will be bright green once again. I have seen many seasons come and go in my life. Some have been pretty harsh and bleak like Winter; however I have the hope that restoration and renewal is taking place.  I love the hope and promise that God will restore all that the stinking devil has stolen from me... what a great promise... and I am so ready to claim back all that is mine!
~Joel 2:23-26 "...rejoice in the Lord your God, for He has given you the autumn rains in righteousness. He sends you abundant showers, both autumn and spring rains, as before. The threshing floors will be filled with grain; the vats will overflow with new wine and oil. I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten- the great locust and the young locust, the other locusts and the locust swarm... my great army that I sent among you. You will have plenty to eat, until you are full, and you will praise the name of the Lord your God, who has worked wonders for you; never again will my people be shamed."

Monday, September 19, 2011


Friends are sure nice to have... some are for a lifetime and these are rare gems that are to be cherished. They stick around no matter what. We all have had other kinds though that flee at the faintest offense, and just when you thought you had a friend... off they went their merry way... talking crap about you, and decided that they just weren't your friend after all. Then sometimes people just change, and their personality no longer is compatible with yours. They change so much you can hardly believe it is even the same person who you once knew so well. This is disappointing and hard to take. I am comforted this morning by the fact that there is a friend that has always been, and always will be by my side through thick and through thin and has never changed and never will! He has promised to never leave me or forsake me... He always wants only what is best for "Me" and is not thinking of other motives. His love is unfailing and unchanging! I am so glad for the friend I have in Jesus... He never has, or never will, let me down!
~Psalm 13:5&6 "But I trust in your unfailing love; my heart rejoices in your salvation. I will sing to the Lord, for He has been good to me."

Saturday, September 17, 2011

The Truck

If you are a mom and have boys, then you know that without ever teaching them how... they automatically seem to know how to play with cars and trucks from the time they can move around and make a noise! That is how it has always been...My son Justin was no exception to this rule. As a matter of fact, I still have a small metal lunch box of his just full to the brim with little matchbox cars and trucks that used to be all over the living room floor. It was never difficult to figure out what to get him for birthdays and Christmases, as a new truck or car would always suit him just fine. Well, now he is a man, and one that has new dreams and new goals. A year ago at this time, I was so concerned for his direction and began praying for him to find a new path. He has done that and I am proud of him, for not only pursuing it, but finishing it and here is his new truck! He no longer has to walk the halls of the depressing prison where he was an officer night after night. He can now be out on the open road exploring all that this country has to offer. May angels sit all upon the outside of this gorgeous truck of his, and protect him on his journey through life. God always has a plan to help us better ourselves... sometimes we just have to let go of the one thing we are holding so tightly to in order for Him to give us the better plan!
~Jeremiah 29:11 " For I know the plans I have for you," says the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

Monday, September 12, 2011

Rise And Rise Again

I love this quote from the movie Robin Hood: "Rise and Rise again ..until lambs become lions." It means to never give up. No matter how many times you have to start over from scratch.... do it. No matter how many battles you fight and seemingly lose... keep on fighting them. Maybe at times you feel like I do.. like you just can't go on this way another single day and don't have it in you to fight anymore... maybe you don't think you know how to make a way of escape out of your bondage that you are in...but God already has a plan and already has given the weapons you need... so don't give up..Fight! He is a very loving, just, God who does see all and cares so don't ever think for a second that He doesn't pay attention to any thing that seems like injustice. It will be taken care of.
 ~Psalm10:14 "But you, O God, do see trouble and grief; you consider it to take it in hand. The victim commits himself to you; you are the helper of the fatherless."
~Psalm10:15 "Break the arm of the wicked and evil man; call him to account for his wickedness that would not be found out."

Friday, September 9, 2011

What Are Your Plans?

What are your plans for today? How about tomorrow? Next week? Maybe you even have plans all made up for three or more months in advance. I find that next to impossible to do anymore.... I was sitting in the laundry mat yesterday trying to mind my own business but couldn't help but overhear a cell phone conversation of someone telling the person on the other end of all of the plans of various travel destinations that this couple was going to visit. The plans were in so much detail that it amazed me. It went something like this..."well by October we will be in Albuquerque, then we will be headed to here and then there and by thanksgiving we are going to stop in and eat at such and such a restaurant and then by Christmas we should be out in California.... Oh by the first of the year we will meet you in...." This person continued to talk and told of plans all the way up til March and April of this next year! I couldn't help but think to myself that with this sickness that I have, I have learned to take it one day at a time... I don't tend to make plans way ahead of time simply because I just don't know what each day will be like when I get up each morning. I can't even imagine what it would be like to have such great health that I could be on the go like that couple at the laundry mat! Anyway the thought also occurred to me that they may make their plans like that but they have no idea what may transpire from day to day that may interrupt that plan in some way. So I have this day....even in one day I have found that my plans can go awry so I dare not plan too far ahead....
~"Boast not thyself of tomorrow for thou knowest not what a day may bring forth."
~"This is the day the Lord has made, let us rejoice and be glad in it."

Thursday, September 8, 2011

Big Cover Up

How bout it....do we believe the Bible or not? Do we preach one thing and then do another when it comes to our own lives? Are we all just a bunch of pious hypocrites?  How about the verse that says," He that covereth his sin shall not prosper but he that confesses and forsakes it shall find mercy." When we do something wrong and always shift the blame to others or try to hide under the skirts of other people to cover us or shield us from the consequences of our own sins then we are just guilty of a big cover up! It is a coward who will not own up to what he or she has done and take responsibility for their actions. It takes guts and fortitude to stand up and say when you are wrong and when you have done some atrocious deed that is shameful... but if you want God's blessings on your life then this is exactly what He wants. I am sick and tired of people calling themselves fine Christians.... and then even when they are caught red handed doing something they deny it or shift the blame or try to get out of the consequences! Come on! Just admit it... take your lickings like a man and then maybe God will prosper you!

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

There Is A Rainbow!

I love rainbows in the sky.They give hope...for a brighter day. Promise of the ending of the storm. Whenever we are going through a tough time it is easy to feel as if it will never end and that there is no light at the end of the tunnel. Maybe it feels like your rainbow will never radiate in the sky... it will. It is so easy to let yourself give into feelings of rejection, loneliness, and depression, but God has promised to never leave or abandon me, and if this is true, which it is,,, then why do I allow myself to let feelings of hopelessness creep in? I have to believe that He is still in control and will come through for me... He knows where I am...He knows what I am feeling... He does care. The end will be better than the beginning. I cannot allow my feelings to dictate to me how my day is going to go. Give all of your fears, disappointments, to Him. He is the only one who can fix them, and if there is something you need to do yourself He will show you... be listening in the stillness, for He tends to speak when you are quiet. Even Jesus felt the need to get alone and go up into the mountain to pray. In those moments when I am feeling so alone, I must remind myself that whether I feel it or not... God is with me because He said so!                                                                                                 ~Hebrews 13:5 "Never will I leave you, Never will I forsake you."                                                                                                            ~Jeremiah 29:11 " For I know the plans I have for you", declares the Lord," plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Fields Of Green

"I see fields of green... red roses too"... blah- blah- blah- blah....blah- blah- blah- blah... "and I think to myself... what a wonderful world".... hmmm, really? Seriously? In a few weeks,  or maybe a month at max, this field of green will have turned to a poopy brown and the leaves will be changed also, and there will be a very cool chill in the air. Blah!  I guess you could call this the  "blah humbug" of the last days of summer. It is ending... the little kiddies are bugging their parents for all of the latest back to school gear and the latest in style gadgets in order to be cooler than the kid next door. I sound a bit bitter that summer is ending? Yep .... I love summer and hate winter  that is just the honest truth... it is not that I am a foreigner to the cold and ice of the northern hemisphere! I grew up in Connecticut where the winters are just as harsh as Wisconsin, but I still do not like to be cold! I do not like to have to stay indoors and stay put. I like to be on the go and to be around a lot of people. To be cooped up in my house with the dog and three cats and a man all day long, is not my idea of  a good way to spend my day. I already have a plan for this winter.... I am calling it my "plan to escape insanity".... I have several ideas for some children's books that I am working on and hopefully will actually get them written on the many snowy cooped up kind of days that I know we will have. Oh I am sure there will be a few of those snowy days when I will feel like pulling my hair out and will forget that I wrote this, but for now I am telling you, that when you feel poopy, and you think the field of green is virtually non existent ...remember that something good comes out of each day as we give our cares and disappointments to the only one who can do anything about them. God Himself. Face it ....no one else really wants to hear about all of your woes anyway... for the most part. I  am glad that when my field of green seems to have disappeared...He lovingly does something really amazing for me to remind me that He still is with me and cares.. nothing escapes His watchful eye and He will right the wrongs. It will all be clear one day.

"And we know that all things work together for good to them who love God, to them who are the called according to His purpose." Rom.8:28

Monday, August 29, 2011

Hello Irene!

Hello Irene.... not so nice to meet you!

On the boardwalk Ocean City, Md

A twister hovering in Md
This hurricane could have done so much more destruction than it did and for that we should all be thankful. As I watched the weather channel very closely almost non-stop during the duration of this hurricane especially as it made its way along the lower eastern shore where I have lived and where I have family members and friends, I was very concerned for their safety and thought in no way that the media was making too much out of it! I thought they did a fantastic job of warning people and of getting people prepared. It is much better to be prepared than to be taken unawares and wiped out!  It still was very destructive all up and down the eastern seaboard, and there are many people who will be struggling in the near future here to rebuild and put their lives back together. It is a mess especially in New England right now... so just because you maybe were not affected by this doesn't mean the media put too much hype into it! If it were you ... you would probably feel differently. Be thankful it was not as bad as predicted and learn from this one since it probably will not be the last.

Thursday, August 25, 2011

Worry Wart

I was talking to some ladies the other day and we all admitted  to being worry warts at one time or another. It is easy to do...there are always concerns and things on our minds that can cause us to be anxious and to fret and get upset. It is easy to lay awake all night long going over different scenarios in our wee little brains until we have a massive headache. A sweet older lady was talking about this very thing and mentioned that a very special verse had meant so much to her on a few such occasions lately when she found herself just way too anxious, worried and uptight. It has been a rebuke to me these past few days as I am well aware of this verse. One that was memorized many years ago. At times when I am especially longing for "peace" and "quiet" I really should remind myself of this instead of fretting and struggling to work everything out on my own.  Today...let's give it a try.."Alright, Lord...Here it is....I have this situation that I need you to work out!....Instead of me worrying and fretting today, help me to trust you to lead, guide, direct my paths, and provide the means for me to do what ever it is that you are expecting me to do!" Now..I plan on drinking a bit more coffee and getting on with my day.
              Isaiah 26:3 "Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on thee because he trusteth in thee."

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Lost Keys

I headed out into the field yesterday sprayed down from head to toe with bug spray. My straw hat upon my head and two long sleeve shirts on for added protection against the bugs and the prickers since I was planning on getting into the blackberry bushes. I stuck my cell phone in my back pocket just in case by some weird fluke I might actually get a signal way out yonder in my field. I also put my bundle of keys in my jeans pocket since I never leave the house without them. I grabbed my wooden walking stick with the animal footprints painted on it. I was ready to pick berries! Off I went into the field, only not as briskly as I used to before this lung surgery and this Sarcoidosis. I was soon oblivious to everything around me except for the big purple blackberries hanging off of the prickly bushes, and as the mosquitoes buzzed angrily in my ears, I picked as quickly as I could and tried to keep from being bitten. The bug spray just was NOT working so I had picked enough after about a half hour and decided to head back. I realized I had walked quite far and was pooped by the time I got back to the house. Just when I reached into my jeans for my keys I noticed they were no longer with me! Panic! OK, I have to admit that I was so exhausted from this walking in the field already that I really just wanted to lay down and cry! I sat outside on a stump for a few minutes  and thought. I did not remember having a spare key to my car... I absolutely had to go back through the field and the blackberry bushes and retrace my steps and find those keys!! UGH! It was going to be an impossible task and I was SO tired! Up I got, and started up the hill again, looking on the ground. As I continued walking I started talking out loud to God... "OK God.. you know where I dropped those keys... and you know how tired I am... PLEASE, Help me to find them, and soon!"  I walked a bit further looking along the edge and started to get a little teary and almost ready to give up and then I saw the bundle of keys sticking out of the bushes... right where I had apparently bent over to pick some berries and lost them out of my pocket. It was a good reminder to me that even in simple frustrations such as these I need to seek His help and He is there for me. If He cares to help me in something this trivial then I know that He will help me with the much larger problems that I face. I am so thankful that I have a friend that loves and cares about everything that I am going through... both the big and the small problems. He even cared about my lost keys.

Friday, August 19, 2011

This Worn Path

This worn path I've walked down before many years ago, and many times. The difference between then and now, is that now I walked it alone and then, I had little hands in mine and plastic buckets and blankets and towels, draped over the arms. As I now trudged wearily up this slightly inclined path, and stopped several times along the way to catch my breath... I wondered where the time had gone. It seemed like it was yesterday when it was a lazy summer's afternoon and my four children were playing in the water on their green alligator or building sand castles on the beach nearby. I take in the beauty of this place and the calming effect of the sound of the waves crashing upon the shore. This is one of my favorite places. I sit here on the concrete wall overlooking the water with so much weighing on my mind.
I have just come from a funeral. A very blunt reminder once again of the brevity of life. It sinks into my soul of how very quickly the past fifteen years have flown by. I try to recall them one by one but find it so difficult to picture all that I so desperately want to remember. I am ashamed of myself for how much time I have personally wasted on trivial things that really don't matter. I think again of my illness and wonder if perhaps I may not have much time left. I surely don't want to waste it on such trivial things. I want to be at peace with the people in my life and if they cant be at peace with me then they need to free me from themselves. Life is too short and goes by way too quickly...use your time wisely for you only pass this way once.

Saturday, August 13, 2011

Crossed Paths

I am still amazed at times when I look over my life and see the many different people that have been in my life and have crossed paths with me at one time or another. some have only popped in for a second or two it seems and others have stayed on when I at times wished they would disappear! I believe there are very specific reasons why certain people cross paths and why they are in your life. The reason may not be all so evident at the time but as you look back it becomes more clear. Yesterday I had just got home from a failed fishing trip when I received a phone call from the hospital. A dear friend of mine was brought to the hospital by ambulance and had given my name as someone he knew would pray for him. I of course went right away to see how he was. I have only known him for a little over a year now but felt as though I had known him all of my life. He comes to our prayer group. Yes I said, "He". We have a ladies prayer group... but this man who is disabled, asked if he could join us and we said yes so ...in the process of allowing him to come this man who was abandoned at birth and placed in an orphanage in Chicago, and later adopted ...was saved as a result of us "letting him in" our group. He has the kindest heart of anyone I have ever met in my entire life. His family has pretty much abandoned and rejected him at one time or another, and he is virtually alone in this world. God put him in my path for a reason.... As I sat by his bed at the hospital last night I realized how God sees this man is so different than other people do. I wonder if we are looking at people through the right eyes? I hope I am. Maybe I need to pay more attention to the people who cross my path.... there is a reason.

Friday, August 12, 2011

Seek peace and pursue it.... yeah...hard to do when some are so argumentative and stubborn. People hear what they want to hear..have you noticed that? You say red, they say blue. You say yes, they say no... doesn't matter what the subject. How then, can you have peace with a person like that? I must choose within myself to not listen to the emotional temper tantrums of people who can't accept reality. Stop allowing yourself to be agitated by people who provoke and irritate so easily. Let them be, and don't let them steal your joy.                                                                                                                                                John 14:27 "Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you......Do not let your hearts be troubled."

Thursday, August 11, 2011

Time For Something Good

I can hardly stand to watch the news anymore... there are so many negative disturbing events being brought to  our attention. I think as I watch ... it is time for something good! I am sick of hearing about all of this horrible news. Can they find something good to report?  The same holds true in my own personal life... sometimes I just get sick and tired of hearing about all of the negative news (gossip), that people have to tell. Is there never anything good to report? Why is it that people like to focus on the ugly side of life? When talking about a relative always have to tell you all of the "bad" things going on in their life but not one good thing? There must be something good ... somewhere...I suppose all of us at one time or another have been guilty of being the reporter and of being the receiver. Anyway you look at it.. it is time for something good! I for one, want to concentrate more on the positve things in my life and though it is difficult to find any sometimes... if I search hard enough I will find them! If I expect them from God then I do find them...and many times I have to just turn my back on the negative people around me and say I am not interested in what they have to say. It isn't worth the time it takes for them to say what they just said about so and so.  People tend to become negative busybodies in other peoples business when they don't have anything to do... so maybe you just need something constructive to do besides minding everyone else's business.  I love for my true friends to tell me they are praying for me... that is great and I am so thankful for those kind of friends... what I can't stand are people who use "prayer requests" as an excuse to get on the phone and gossip negatively about someone. I long for something good....The Psalmist also longed to see a sign of goodness from God.... He must have been feeling similar to what I am feeling.

Psalm 86:17 " Give me a sign of your goodness, that my enemies may see it and be put to shame, for you O Lord, have helped me and comforted me."

Wednesday, August 10, 2011

Just A Matter Of Time

Seeing the bales of hay in the field and feeling the early morning chill in the air is a stark reminder that summer is drawing to a very quick end here in Wisconsin. It is a short season here but so appreciated especially by me! In just a matter of time the short season of summer will be over and the leaves will all be changed to a wide variety of colors across the top of this hill.  I have been outdoors, soaking up the fresh warm sunshine, as much as possible, for I know that shortly here, I will be all snuggled up on my sofa, wrapped in blankets, with the wood stoves fired up. Soon the dog and three cats will be laying around lazily, also not wanting to go outside in the cold! I am not an outdoor person when winter comes! I was quite surprised this morning when there was such a chill in the air. It really is beginning to feel more like fall. I even saw a few trees with red and orange leaves already! Of course the stores all have their ''Back to School" stuff out on display already and some even are putting out their Halloween stuff! Wow...nothing like rushing the seasons! I just want to make summer last as long as possible! Maybe we will actually get a very warm fall....all the way until Thanksgiving.... wishful thinking! All of this quick season changing here in Wisconsin makes me think that whatever I am going to get done I better hurry up and do it! I need to quit procrastinating things... I am pretty good at doing that...partly because I just don't feel well most of the time but sometimes just because I guess I figure I have plenty of time to get certain things accomplished. Boy... my life is just a few more seasons and then it is done... I had better hurry up and do whatever it is I am going to do .... make use of my time.... I don't have time to waste it on people who don't care for me or just want to find something to criticize me about. My clock is ticking ... and every minute that goes by is a minute that could be used for something positive. Even when I am just sitting here sick... I can write and encourage someone else, or pray for someone or give someone a call. 
                                                    "Teach me to number my days..." Psalm 90:12

Monday, August 8, 2011

Let Him In The Boat

I am not a fan of row boats. I know they are a lot of hard work especially if you are rowing against the wind or trying to row upstream. I would rather just float down a river on a rubber raft on a calm sunny day, watching the clouds go by. At times in my life it has felt as if I have been rowing against the wind and no matter how hard the oars are dipping and pulling at the water around me, I just stay in the same place. The disciples once had the same problem after they went out into the boat on the lake. It seems they were fighting against the wind and struggling and Jesus saw them from the mountaintop where he was and actually walked on top of the water to get to them! I know many over educated theologians have at one time or another tried to explain this incident in the Bible away... I happen to believe it happened just the way it says. When He got to the boat where they were... He got in and the winds died down and they proceeded to the other side safely. What if they didn't let Him in the boat? Good question for myself....I guess it is a duh...moment...so many times I am just rowing away against the wind and there He is just waiting to get into the boat but I think I can handle it myself so continue to struggle needlessly.  Wow... OK.. I give up... I stop frantically rowing .... please get in the boat, Lord.... please, calm the storm... you can get me where I need to be much better than I can!

Mark 6:48 "He saw the disciples straining at the oars, because the wind was against them."
Mark 6:51 "Then He climbed into the boat with them, and the wind died down."

Sunday, August 7, 2011

Roll With The Punches

Well I guess this is a lesson of life I have been learning through all of my sickness and various weird problems! When you go through many trials over and over you somehow become pretty flexible and learn to not get too wound up if things don't go exactly as planned. You learn to "roll with the punches".  I had some great plans of doing a major amount of cleaning yesterday since it was really the first day since my surgery back in June that I actually wasn't in severe pain, so I thought I would take advantage and get busy and do a bit of some long overdue organizing and cleaning. I got into it about one hour but then found out that my pain- free day quickly changed into a high pain day with new symptoms thrown in... so, the cleaning and organizing, although I did get a start on it; got put on hold once again. Years ago, this would have made me pretty upset and I would have been in a foul mood for the rest of the day... but I decided it wasn't worth it...Sometimes MY plans get altered and I need to alter my attitude. Sometimes that is the best thing I can learn from it.....just to "roll with the punches" and quit having a "pity party" when everything doesn't work out exactly as I planned. I honestly believe that sometimes God arranges for My plans to be messed up on purpose....maybe He wants me to just sit back and realize it didn't really matter anyway.  

Saturday, August 6, 2011

Not A Morning Person

Not a morning person? Hmmm. Have a few kids and you will soon become one. Your days of sleeping in are soon over once little junior arrives on the scene. I have never been a "morning" person really however, had two sets of twins plus one so didn't ever get a chance to not be a morning person ... it's just that a lot of those years of doing it I just didn't really feel like it! That's where the coffee habit came into play and the more I have aged the stronger my coffee has needed to be! Seriously though, I have learned that I cannot allow my natural feelings to dictate how my day is going to go. Naturally I kind of wake up a bit on the down side every day... not sure if this is "normal" or not or just part of "ME" but I have to pretty much fight this every day of my life. Maybe I am not alone and you also have this ...."Not a morning person" syndrome. The most beneficial thing I found that helps me get past my first twenty minutes is to take the time to sit with my cup of extra strong coffee and sip and pray and pray. God doesn't seem to mind that I am enjoying my coffee while talking to Him... and it does help me wake up. Just saying.... you don't have to "Play church" and get down on your knees and act all "holier than thou"! God sees you just the way you are anyway so why not just be yourself around  Him? If you can't be real with God you certainly can't be real with anyone else ... not even yourself. Sometimes I just sit quiet and don't even know what to say to God... it is at those times I know He is just sitting next to  me ... just there. I have discovered that even though I am not much of a morning person... God certainly is.
~ Psalm 5:3 "In the morning, O Lord, you hear my voice; in the morning I lay my requests before you in expectation."

Friday, August 5, 2011

I Beg Your Pardon....

"I beg your pardon... I never promised you a rose garden..." just a song from years past but I can't stop thinking of it. I just don't get it... why do some people think and act as if they are supposed to live a life free of sickness and pain just because they believe the Bible? No where in the Bible does it even teach this false doctrine. Just because you act pious and teach Sunday School and tell everyone you meet that you are a Christian doesn't mean that your life is going to be free of hardship. Who do you think you are, that you are not going to be sick at some point in this life? As long as we are breathing we are going to have some kind of trial going on either in our own personal life or in someone who is close to us. We are not immune from these troubles just because we can shout a "Hallelujah" louder than anyone else. Who ever told you that? Whoever it was, got it mixed up. God never promised us a problem free life... He did promise to go with us through the problems. He never promised to take them all away.... He does help us become the person He wants us to become through them. Our problems are not punishments as some teach... He is not a big, bad, boogey man in the sky waiting to pounce. Maybe that is the kind of father you were to your children so that is all you know how to compare ....but He is not like that from what the Bible teaches...if you really read it.
This is why, I do not agree with people who plead with God for Him to take away their sickness.. I do not do this. Maybe you disagree with me, but I figure if God allowed this it must be for a reason.  If He wants to heal me He certainly can and will in His timing. But for me to tell Him what to do is a bit too much for me! I have made that mistake before and it cost me a lot... so if I were you I would be very careful telling God what to do. God is God .... He can do whatever it is He wants to DO! He is the one at the potter's wheel... I am just the lump of clay. He knows how to make it into something more. Our life here on Earth is not going to be perfect so why are we so upset when it isn't? Learn to accept from His hand the good and the not so good or what seems not so good at the time. I have learned that sometimes the things that seem so horrible at the time ...later on actually have turned out to be a good thing. I understand a little better now why it was that after so much sickness and suffering Job was able to say...."though he slay me yet will I trust in Him." He learned this principle... that God does indeed see the whole picture and knows and wants whatever is BEST for me. I may not have a "rose garden" life but I was not promised one.
                                                                                                                                                                                  Job 23:10~ "But He knoweth the way that I take; when He hath tried me I shall come forth as gold."

Thursday, August 4, 2011

What's So Funny

It's been awhile since I had a real laughing fit but there have been times when I have been so tickled by something that I just had to laugh and maybe couldn't stop. Usually it is when you are not supposed to be laughing... maybe it is "inappropriate" like at church...God forbid you should crack a smile or break out into a giggle! I honestly believe that some people think, the more sour and puckered up their face looks, the more spiritual they are, so they never smile or laugh. I have to laugh at people who go overboard on the serious... are they for real? I was wondering this morning about God and if He has a sense of humor. I answered my own question I guess, because the more I thought about this, the more I realized that He made us the way we are in the first place. We have the ability to laugh! Why would we have this if we weren't supposed to use it? It would be like putting a radio or CD player in a car but then saying "do not use", on it! Just because you are a Christian doesn't mean you need to go around like the most sour- puss, serious person, on the face of the planet and scorn anyone else who seems to be the least bit joyful. Relax... it's OK to smile a little.... laugh a little... enjoy your life a little...God's idea of an abundant life that He gives us, is not sitting around being miserable, negative, worrisome, and depressed!                                                                                                                                      Psalm 126~ " Our mouths were filled with laughter, our tongues with songs of joy."

Monday, August 1, 2011

Hot In Wisconsin?

I can hardly even believe this myself ... I knew it was hot out yesterday as it was affecting the way I felt. Headache, fatigue, achy, lousy, you name it... but I had no idea the temp was actually up over 100 in the sun! Our house stays pretty cool on the inside with the AC and the ceiling fans so I really didn't notice too much until I looked out the kitchen window and noticed the needle! Of course this is in the sunniest spot! I couldn't help but take a picture to remind myself of this when I am sitting here this next winter freezing and looking out at all of that white stuff that we get here! It seemed like spring and summer would never get here to the north woods of  Wisconsin...and yet here it was Hot in Wisconsin yesterday! Waiting for things sometimes is a royal pain in the rear. It seems that things take extra long to take place when you are waiting especially for that one thing to happen! Looking at this yesterday I thought of how stupid it is to get all worked up over the waiting part... because summer does eventually come and what is supposed to happen usually takes place in the proper timing. So it may seem like something is just not happening right now and is taking forever but it will eventually.... so just hang in there and wait with patience. Just as the cold and ice turn to warmth and green grass, so the hardships of this life will soon turn to something more desirable.
                            "Wait on the Lord, be of good courage He shall strengthen thine heart."

Sunday, July 31, 2011

Power Outage

OK...two mornings in a row I have had to go without my Folger's in my cup first thing and have not been able to get on the computer. This really cramps my style! I love to have my quiet coffee time in the morning. I can't think straight until the first few sips. I just had to sit and wait a while and before not too long, the power came on and it was morning as usual. The coffee got made and on with my day I went. Back in the day it was no big deal to not have electricity, I suppose. It was a way of life for the pioneers. They made do with what they had, but for us today, when the power goes out ...nothing works! We are crippled, in a sense. I find myself without power when I forget to pray about things. When I tend to make things work on my own. I realize how much I need power in my everyday activities around the house here......the coffee pot...light switch in the dark bathroom...stove....on and on the list goes. How ridiculous it is for me to think I can make it through even one day without prayer, which really gives me the power  from God that I need.

2 Corinthians 12:9 "..My grace is sufficient for you, for my strength is made perfect in weakness."

Friday, July 29, 2011

Thirsty As A Deer

Here in the Northwoods of Wisconsin there are plenty of deer. I prefer to admire their beauty... I don't shoot! We also seem to have our fair share of Apple trees. I never realized that deer eat apples, and perhaps you never knew that either. Yesterday, while out near some apple trees that are already being weighed down with many apples on their branches, I noticed this deer standing there. It was stretching forth its neck to grab the lowest branch in its teeth. I watched a few minutes and thought it was just eating the leaves but the longer I stood there, realized that this deer was actually struggling with picking an apple! It finally did get the apple after a few tries and munched away, oblivious to my nosiness! I thought to myself what a perfect place for deer to roam....apple trees...fields...woods...and yes even a stream running through the property! After eating a few apples I am sure that deer must have been thirsty. It brings to mind a verse I memorized a long time ago...Psalm 42:1"As the deer pants for streams of water, so my soul pants for you, O God."

Thursday, July 28, 2011

Throw It Into The Fire

Camping just isn't camping without a campfire! Usually when I go camping I have one every night and of course bring along the marshmallows, graham crackers and Hershey bars in order to make S'mores. It is just comforting to sit there in the glow of the orange and yellow flames and listen to the crackling of the wood as the flames lick it. It makes me think of something I heard once of writing down every care, every burden, every problem, everything that keeps me troubled.....fold it up, cast it into that fire and as you cast it ...tell God you are giving all of this care to Him....it is not mine to carry anymore... I release it . Get rid of the care or it will keep you underneath it. Maybe you need a good old fashioned campfire and a piece of paper....maybe you need to write down all of the junk that is weighing you down and then just cast it on God and throw it into the fire and don't pick it up again.
1Peter 5:7 "Casting all your care upon Him for He careth for you."

Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Life Is Better At The Cabin

"Life is better at the cabin"... a sign that is in my friend's cottage, and one that is indeed true! This past weekend we spent three and a half days of quiet and relaxing hours just listening to the sounds of nature and found it to be so much better than the alternative....stress! As I sat on the screened in porch of this cottage that overlooks the lake, I pondered what it was that made this place so different from home. Why is it so much easier to relax and just feel stress-free here? I soon got out a notepad and a pen and began to jot down all of the reasons why I thought this place was so peaceful. One of the very first things I noticed was how far back in the woods we were and away from the main road. I don't think I heard even one car or truck the entire time we were there! No phone ringing every so often there! As a matter of fact it didn't even ring once! The cell phone didn't ring either and that in itself is a miracle! There was no unwanted catalogs or overdue bills to worry about since there was no mail delivery! No neighbors... except for the ones going by in their boats slowly enjoying their fishing ... if you want to count those! No TV stressing me out with the bad reports on the nine O' clock news! Although there was a small flat screen TV, its purpose was for watching movies on. The morning time with my coffee was only interrupted by the songs of the Loons calling to each other from across the lake. Ahhh..I think I choose that.....I realized while enjoying the quietness of this place how much closer God seems when you are there.....but it also makes me realize that it is our own noisy lives for the reason we feel we cannot or do not hear from Him. Once more I am reminded...."Be still and know that I am God...."

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Strength In Numbers

One strand of thread is not very sturdy and can be broken in half pretty easily. If you take three pieces and braid them together into one strand then it is a lot sturdier and harder to break. There is a certain strength in numbers. No one really wants to be all alone all of the time. I do admit that for the most part I am a loner by nature. Have always pretty much been an independent thinker and I don't allow other people to manipulate my thinking; or at least I resist it... I should say. There have been times a manipulator or two has slipped past me unawares. It is true however that there is strength in numbers. When people who have the same kinds of issues band together and work on these issues something gets accomplished. The age of the Internet has brought people together in ways that were never possible in previous generations. The things that can be accomplished are great. I am sure that when these social networks were begun, no one ever imagined how far reaching it would go. I was thinking on this today and realized that long before anyone ever set up a social media...God had one set in place. He already mentioned it.... "where two or three are gathered together in my name ... there I am in the midst of them"... also, "a three fold cord cannot easily be broken". Strength in numbers....when many people, together of one purpose, and one mind, pray ....there is strength. Something will be accomplished!

Monday, July 18, 2011

Just Words?

I see these words every time I sit on my toilet! You may think I am crass. No...just blunt and sometimes downright crude but I think if you would be honest with yourself for a few seconds you would have to admit too that there have been times you have thought these are just words. Are these only worthless words that have no meaning or significance? Does it really matter what or whom you believe in?  When all is said and done ... who really knows, and maybe it is all just made up to make us feel better about life in general? I know that I can "trust in the Lord with all of my heart" and He will work everything out ...I know this because.... I have seen Him do it for ME. It is usually after I have exhausted myself trying to "lean on my own understanding" of the matter! Which is pretty dumb...considering it says, " lean not on your own understanding"! Sometimes we just don't know what to do ...and it is at these times, we need to remind ourselves that He sees the overall picture and scheme of things. He can and will direct our path, and place the right people in our lives and arrange the proper circumstances. I am glad I have someone to rely on. It relieves me a great deal right now as I am facing this terminal illness of Sarcoidosis and Lymphoma. I don't have a clue what lies ahead from one day to the next or even what decisions I will need to make or even how to go about them. I have many different people giving me their many different opinions but in the end I know that it will all work out. So instead of fretting ... I choose to trust..not in myself, but in the Lord.  Instead of crying over having an illness that not many have.... I choose to think of myself as a rare gem....Instead of feeling lonely ...I choose to talk to my best friend who hears my every word. I will wait....trust... and thank Him for helping me through this journey.
                                                                                                                                                               Proverbs 3:5&6 "Trust in the Lord with all thine heart and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge Him and He shall direct thy paths."

Saturday, July 16, 2011

Beautiful Colors....Beautiful People

I went to my first Pow Wow today.  I don't know why it has taken me so long to finally go to one when I live practically right next to the Ojibwe reservation and even taught some of the Ojibwe children a few years ago.The sounds of the drums beating and the vibrant variety of colors swirling around soon captured my attention and as I sat in the sweltering heat I was captivated at the apparent pride of these people before me. I was especially impressed with the fact that I not only saw one particular age group represented but pretty much there was every one from toddler on up to elders dressed in their traditional garb and dancing their traditional dance. I am so impressed that the young people are being taught to carry out the culture of their ancestors and are not just throwing it to the wind. I of course had to have my favorite fry bread while I was there. My own native pride began to swell up somewhere in my veins as I sat there and watched in amazement and wondered what it had been like for my great grandmother many moons ago. There were stories some of which I never quite got the full end of... but somewhere there was some Indian in our blood... well I was believing it as I listened to the beat of these drummers and watched as these people of many different ages with their terrific colors proudly strutted around the pow wow grounds... I had the urge to go out there and join them and hold my head up high! Not only were their colors beautiful but in all of my experiences, these Indian people are so very beautiful also. I tried not to be too obvious but the woman sitting next to me was passing the time by beading. It was so pretty. She was friendly also and had won a prize for her fry bread. Another was so gracious to let me take a picture with him and I just know God put him in my path...what are the odds....he told me he had battled cancer and won. It was what I needed to hear and I certainly wasn't expecting it from him. It was at just the right time. What a beautiful way to spend a hot summer day. These proud native Americans were an absolute beautiful reminder that life can be beautiful.

Thursday, July 14, 2011

Choose Your Campsite Wisely

I love to go camping. Not really sure why...since it really is a lot of work when you think about it. I haven't been yet this summer due to my health and my surgery but I am determined that at some point before fall it will happen! I don't think an RV equipped with air conditioner and TV and DVD player is really camping... I enjoy sleeping in a tent and sitting around a campfire. Sleeping in a tent can be relaxing..if you pick your campsite carefully! If however you are not careful and you end up setting up your tent in the wrong place it can be nothing but trouble! I have had the experience of having my tent in the wrong place ...noisy campers, up all hours of the night, or maybe my tent was down in a rut and it rained all night and I ended up floating in a few inches of water by morning....not too fun! I have found out the hard way that raccoons and other nighttime critters love dumpsters so stay away from campsites that are near them! I certainly would not choose to put my tent down there on purpose! There are so many other campsites to choose from so why would I plant my tent in an unpleasant place when I could choose to be somewhere else? If you want your camping experience to be a relaxing and pleasant one then you need to be careful about choosing your campsite. Always check out the neighborhood before you build your campsite or you may be really sorry you pitched your tent there. There may be other critters living in the nearby woods that have been inhabiting it before you ever arrived on the site and they may not be so excited about you interrupting their life in the big woods. You may be wishing you had never built your campsite there. If you do not like bugs or bears or snakes or raccoons.... then stay out of their campsite!

Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Like A Butterfly

I hate losing things! It is so darn frustrating. Yesterday we ended up spending a good portion of our day looking for something that had been either misplaced or lost and it was not a fun way to spend the afternoon. Short term memory problems are not a fun thing to have either as you just can't recall what, when, where, or why,  and whoever is trying to help you recall, is just an annoyance! So I think that looking for something that is lost, is like trying to catch a butterfly that is fluttering all around your head. You keep trying to capture it with your hands and maybe go around in circles to ensnare it, but the more you swipe at it and try, the more you miss it! Our searching high and low everywhere for the item that was lost, resulted in no item retrieved; but I soon decided it was not worth getting upset over and was high time to just forget it! I am sure that the offending item will show up and land right smack in front of us somehow at a time when we no longer need it or are in want of it! I have had this experience with butterflies before.....I never have been too good at catching them but I do know that after a while if you just sit still and stop swiping at them they may just come quietly and land on you! Sometimes I think we search for other things like happiness this way too and look in all the wrong places. We sometimes need to just "Be Still".

Monday, July 11, 2011

That Stinks!

I hate to admit to some of you that I am human and feel like this but .... sometimes life feels like a stinky pile of dirty diapers! I have had my share of those and I have had my share of life! I know I am not supposed to ever think that life stinks, but you know what? Sometimes it just does! There are days that just go like this and you wonder if things will ever change or get better? Or maybe they will just get worse? Is there really any hope that I might ever be the slightest bit pain free again? Why is it that you see some people living a life of ease and sheer luxury and enjoyment and others struggle their entire lives and have misery every second until they die? I just heard about a really old couple separating! Just can't stand each other any more... they are in their eighties! Wow. Now that kind of stinks! Then people get fired without so much as a warning... no matter that there are bills to pay and mouths to feed. There is another stink! Some poor woman is abused her whole life and instead of the abuser dying, the woman ends up with cancer and leaves small children behind. That really stinks!!So many stinky diapers in this life. They can really pile up if we let them. I can easily let myself become overwhelmed with all of the stinky stuff surrounding me or I can one by one give them over to the only one who can do anything about it all.....sometimes I admit that when I give them to God they probably sound like a big complaint to Him... but I know He hears me and I also know He cares. He can clean out those stinky diapers and clean house quicker than I can even imagine. I just sometimes forget to take it all to Him...and say,"that really stinks God, can you PLEASE do something about that?"

my prayer

my prayer